Seriously though...

So, I've realized in looking back at my blog that it looks like all I ever do is spoil Hayley. While that's true lately, I've also realized that I have some reasoning behind it. I think that subconsciously I'm a little apprehensive about this new child coming along. I'm not nervous that he won't be loved, or that I won't be a good mom, or that I won't be able to figure out how to be a mom to a boy (although that presents a whole new set of fun and games, apparently), rather I'm nervous that two kids seems like so much more effort.

We've been a one kid family for over three years now. At first I was just worried about what Hayley's reaction to this baby would be, but honestly, I think it's going to be an adjustment for all of us. There are a lot of things that just seem like they will be a lot harder, or not worth it at all. Even just imagining it, it seems that loading two kids into the car and into carseats to take them out again at WalMart, to then load them both in a shopping cart, all to pick up some bread and milk... I think I may rather starve to tell you the truth.

I know that soon, gone will be the days of being able to just plunk Hayley in the car for a full afternoon of errands, and that back will be the more structured days of naps and feedings and interrupted sleep. Only this time, there will be a three-year-old to entertain as well. It just seems like a lot.

I know that many of you with more than one child are old hat at this, and I admire you. I also know that this overwhelmed feeling won't be near as overwhelming as both kids grow, but I don't really know if I want that to happen either.

So, really I'm just trying to squeeze in as much quality time with my only child as I can, before she's not an only child anymore. While I really am so exicted for all the changes that are going to take place in my life, it's still change. And when you feel like you've got such a good thing going already, it's hard to imagine that life could get any better.